So for the last two weeks, my PlayStation 4 hasn’t been working.
To be more precise, it was refusing to play discs.
Everything else was fine: downloaded games worked, apps worked. But the PS4 wouldn’t read any disc at all. Most of my games are on the hard drive, but there were a couple of disc-based games I was hoping to finish (The Last Guardian, Titanfall 2).
Also my copy of Overwatch was on disc.
So this shit wouldn’t fly. I decided to have a go at fixing it.
I’m not very good at fixing things. I’ve never built my own PC and I generally make things worse when I try and solve techy problems, but whatevs. I decided to have a go. After watching a few YouTube instructional videos and borrowing an intense screwdriver set from my brother-in-law, I got to work.
But before I opened anything, I gave my PS4 a gentle shake.
What the hell?
I broke warranty by removing some stickers on the back, allowing me to unscrew certain parts of the PS4 and open it up for the top. After a bit more work I managed to take out the Blu-ray drive.
That’s when I noticed.
What the fucking fuck?
I’ve got a healthy number of screws sitting next to me, but I decide to take this one step further. I took out the Blu-Ray drive.
Yep, that’s exactly what it looks like. Zelda: Tri Force Heroes wedged in my goddamn PS4 Blu-ray drive.
And that’s when it clicked. I have two kids. One just turned four and the other is 12 months old. The oldest has a 3DS but he’s a bit careless about leaving the games lying around. My youngest likes to put those games in his mouth. Why? I have no earthly idea.
My youngest has also developed a habit for putting things into other things.
You don’t have to be Columbo to work out who the culprit is here.
Insanely, once I removed the 3DS cartridge, and put the PS4 back together again, it worked perfectly. Problem solved.
This isn’t the first time they’ve pulled shit like this:
Don't have kids. pic.twitter.com/XbxGsndoSx
— Mark Serrels (@Serrels) November 17, 2016
Mark Serrels writes for Kotaku Australia, where this story was originally published.