If you play Destiny 2, you have a choice in this week’s Faction Rally. You can pledge New Monarchy or Future War Cult. Or, if you really, really want to, you can pledge Dead Orbit.
This week is Destiny 2's second Faction Rally, and the first one since the game came out on PC. That means that, starting today, you can pledge to one of the game’s three factions. Once you’ve pledged, you’ll spend this week earning tokens to spend toward that faction’s distinctive armour and weapons. At the end of the week, whichever faction got the most tokens across all three platforms will win. Those who pledged the winning faction will be able to buy a “reward weapon” for cheap. Everyone else can get the winning faction’s reward weapon as well, but they’ll have to pay a lot more.
If you play much Destiny, you probably know by now how to tell the three factions apart. Future War Cult has the best guns and the worst shaders. New Monarchy has the best armour and the worst politics. And Dead Orbit has the worst everything and yet remains, somehow, the most popular.
Dead Orbit won the first Faction Rally despite having demonstrably inferior gear to both New Monarchy and Future War Cult. Blame the fact that they had some cool shaders in the first Destiny; blame people’s love for Peter Stormare’s performance as Arach Jalaal. Blame the fact that Dead Orbit—whose members like to call themselves “Space Goths”—is basically the only Destiny faction with a discernible personality. Whatever the cause, the rest of us were left being asked to overpay for a mediocre scout rifle.
The only truth this thing tells is that grenade launchers are bad.
This time around, the difference in rewards is even more clear-cut. If Future War Cult wins, everyone gets a fusion rifle. If New Monarchy wins, everyone gets a sword. I’ll grant you that neither of those rewards is all that exciting. But get this: if Dead Orbit wins, everyone gets a grenade launcher.
Destiny 2 grenade launchers are so bad that this almost feels like a test. It’s as if the game is saying, okay, you all seem to like Dead Orbit. But do you like them enough to support them even if it means you’ll get a grenade launcher for your trouble?
Don’t do it. I know you want to. If you’re reading this, you’re probably thinking, “Ha ha, I am going to pledge Dead Orbit just to piss everyone off.” Ignore the little voice in your head. You’re better than that.